|
            
.
SARDAR JI AND BILL GATES
Dear Mr Bill Gates,
This letter is from Banta Singh from Punjab. We have bought a
computer for our home and we found problems, which I want to bring to
your notice.
1. After connecting to internet we planned to open e-mail account and
whenever we fill the form in Hotmail in the password column, only ****** appears, but in the rest of the fields whatever we typed appears, but we face this problem only in password field.
We checked with hardware vendor Santa Singh and he said that there is no problem in keyboard. Because of this we open the e-mail account with password *****.
I request you to check this as we ourselves do not know what the
password is.
2. We are unable to enter anything after we click the 'shut down '
button.
3. There is a button 'start' but there is no "stop" button. We request you to check this.
4. We find there is 'Run' in the menu. One of my friend clicked 'run' has ran upto Amritsar! So, we request you to change that to "sit", so that we can click that by sitting.
5. One doubt is that any 're-scooter' available in system? As I find only 're-cycle', but I own a scooter at my home.
6. There is 'Find' button but it is not working properly. My wife lost
the door key and we tried a lot for tracing the key with this ' find',
but unable to trace. Is it a bug??
7. Every night I am not sleeping as i have to protect my 'mouse' from
CAT, So i suggest u to provide one DOG to protect from the cat.
8. Please confirm when u are going to give me money for winning
'HEARTS' (playing cards in games) and when are u coming to my home to
collect ur money.
9. My child learnt 'Microsoft word' now he wants to learn 'Microsoft
sentence', so when u will provide that?
10. Hey, I brought computer, cpu, mouse and keypad there is only one
icon with 'MY Computer', where is remaining ?
11. And in 'MY Pictures' there is not even single photo of mine, So when u will keep my photo in that.
Sardar sent SMS to his BOSS:
“Me sick, no work”
Boss SMS back:
“When I am sick I kiss my wife try it”
2 hours later sardar sms 2 boss:
“Me ok, ur wife very sweet”
Police:Instead of hospital why did u take ur wife to COMEDY MOVIE during pregnancy
Sardar: ALL the child were crying when they born
I want my child to laugh so i take my wife TO CINEMA
In battle Sardar was wearing mosquito net
instead of bullet proof jacket
why?
?
?
?
Saradar replied
O jis wich machar nai war sakda
goli kithon lange gi
Sardar Bunks office n goes to home.
He saw his wife with his boss.
He comes back running office and says,
‘baap re, boss ne dekh liya hota to maar daalta.
Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai.
Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
Teacher: How Do You Differentiate
“WIFE” & “MOTHER”
SARDAR:
Before Marriage We Sleep With “MOTHER”
&
After Marriage
We Sleep With Our “WIFE”
Judge: why r u arrested?
Sardar: for shopping early?
Judge: well, that’s not a crime,
anyway how early were u shopping?
Sardar: before opening the shop…..:p
Teacher told all students
in a class to write an essay
on a cricket match.
All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote No match, due to rain!!!
Professor:Chemical symbol of Barium?
Sardar: BA
Professor:For sodium?
Sardar: NA
Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA
& 2 atoms of NA combined?
Sardar: BANANA
Hitler says,
“There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary”
Sardar says:Ab bolne se kiya fayidah?
“Jub kharidi thi tab hi check karna tha na”:D
A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
“Hey vaheguru meri lottery lagady.”
After 11 years VaheGuru angrily appeared
& said,”Khoti de putar 1 vari ticket te le ley”
Lawyer to sardar:geeta pe hath rakho
Sardar:Kamal hai, Seeta pe hath rakha
to baat court tak pohanch gaye,
ab bol raha he geeta pe hath rakho:p
Sardar saw a very high Airtel Tower
& red light glowing on the top,
seeing this he said ?India is developing fast,
see there are traffic signals for Aeroplane in the air
Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
In bio practical:
Examiner:Tell me the name of
this bird by seeing it’s legs only?
Sardar:I don’t know.
Examiner:You failed, what’s your name?
Sardar:See my legs & tell my name
1st ever intelligent sardar.
Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?
sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)
A sardar goes to a restaurant
and his cell phone rings.
Wife: How are you?
Surprised Sardarji:Oji I am fine but
how did you know where I was?
posted in Sardar SMS
A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can’t get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.
A sardarji’s boy asked his dad:
What is a grownup joke?
Sardar ji replied:
any joke which is eighteen years old
NURSE kept SARDAR’S FINGER in HER MOUTH
after BLOOD TEST.
THEN SARDAR STARTED DANCING .
NURSE:y r u DANCING.
SARDAR:next is URINE TEST
Sardar to doctor:
When I sleep, monkeys
play football in my dreams.
Dr:No problem,
just take this medicine b4 sleep.
Sardar: Kal se khaonga aaj final hai.
Sardar english k paper main fail ho gaya,
He did translation:
1.Main aam admi nahi hon
I’m not a mango man
2.Sarda or garma fruit hain.
Colda & hota r fruits
3.Mujhey bhi english ati hay
English comes 2 me also
4.do ro do chaar.
give and give four.
5.Mera taluk hari pur hazara se hay
I belong 2 green pur thousanda:)
A sardar had a child after 3 month of marriage.
He asked his wife ye 3 month k bad bacha kaise howa?
Wife replied:tumhari shadi ko kitna arsa hua?
sardar:3 months.
Wife: or meri shadi ko ?
Sardar: 3 months
Wife: or bacha kitne month k baad?
Sardar:3 month.
Wife: total kitne hue?
Sardar: oye 9 months & start dancing
Balle Balle;->
Sardar 2 friend: Guess how many
coins I have in my pocket?
Friend:If I guess right, u give me 1?
Sardar:Oji, I will give both of them
Sardarji to others:
Did anyone lose money wrapped in a rubber band?
One said, Yes I did
Sardar: Well, it’s your lucky day,
I found the rubberband!
Sardar darvaze pe GUN liye khara tha
Wife: y r u standing here?
Sardar: Sher k shikar pe ja raha hon
Wife: To jao na..!
Sardar: Kase jaon baher KUTTA khara hai
Sardar selected a short girl to marry.
Why?
Because guru ji told him
Musibat jitni choti ho utna acha hai …:-P
Four guys
1 from Harward:
1 Oxford
1 Texas
&
a Sardar from Pujab university
1 common question:
What is the fastest thing in world?
Oxford:Light
Harvard:Thought
Texas:Blink of an eye
Sardar:It’s loose motions,
because last night I was lying in my bed
& before I could blink,think or turn on the lights,
it was over!
Tring Tring Tring.
Sardar: Hello kon bol raha hai?
Other side: Ji, main bol raha hon.
Sardar: oye ye to kamal ho gia,
idhar se bhi main hi bol raha hon.
Teacher to Sardar: What is Number “Seven” , Even or Odd
Sardar: Even
Teacher: How can you make seven even?
Sardar:Remove the ‘S’!!
Sardar made a call to the airport.
Asked,”How long is the journey from Punjab to America?”
Receiptionist: “One second sir….”.
Sardar: Ok, thank you..!!!
A Sardar & his wife were waiting for train
itne main KHYBER MAIL aa gaye
Sardar bhag k train mein charha
or
apni wife se bola
jab khyber female aye to tum bhi ajana
Sardar said to doctor:Pore jism main
kahin bhi ungli lagao to bohat dard hota hai,
Doctor suggested full body Xray
when he checked, Xray found fracture in “Ungli”
Newspaper Mein News Lugi K
“50% Of Sardars Are Donkeys”
The Sardars Protested.
Next Day News Lagi K
“50% Of Sardars R Not Donkeys”
The Sardars Celebrated.
Taxi driver to sardar:-
Sardar ji petrol khatam ho gaya ha gaddi agay nahi ja rahi
sardar: Koi gal nahi gaddi piche lelo
Sardar: I hav’nt slept all nite in the train.
Friend: Y?
Sardar: Got upper berth.
Friend: Y did’nt u ecchanged?
Sardar: oye, there was nobody
2 exchange in the lower birth..
Sardarji & his wife going to city in auto.
Driver adjusted miror.
Sardarji shouted you are seeing my wife.
Go & sit back. I will drive auto…:D
Q:- Why does Sardar always smile during lightning storms?
A:- They think their picture is being taken.
Q:Why is a Sardarji standing below
a tube light with a open mouth?
A:Because his doctor advised him
“Today’s dinner should be light”
A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house…
still he was in jail…….why?
coz all the 6 were fire brigade staff !
A Sardar & his wife filed an application for divorce.
Judge asked :
How will you divide, you have 3 children?
Sardar replied :
Ok! We will apply next year.
A sardar went to Pizza Hut.
There he ordered a Pizza.
The Waiter asked him:
Sir shell I cut it into 4 pieces or 8 pieces.
Sardar replied:
O 4 hi le aa yaar,
8 to nahin khaye jayein gay
Teacher: what is the scientific formula for water?
Sardar: h.i.j.k.l.m.n.o.
Teacher: nonsense! how did you derive that?
Sardar: auntie, it is H to O (h2o)!
Sardar got job in a telenor call centre.
Customer: telelenor sim blocked what to do?
Sardar: dont take tension remove telenor &
put warid sim.
Thank you for calling ufone.
A Sardar looking at sky asks another Sardar :
Is that a sun or moon?
Other Sardar replies :
Oye ! No idea…Im new to this city..
Sardarji was asked,
what is a adult joke?
Reply came
any joke which is eighteen years old.
In a party a lady wanted
to go to toilet so
she inquired with a sardar
papaji susu karne ki jagah dikhao,
sardarji replied u naughty
pehle tum dikhao.
Question: Why did 18 Sardars
go to a movie?
Answer: Because below 18
was not allowed.
Do U know why a sardar ji kept
the door open while taking a bath?
Because he was scared that someone
might see through the “KEY HOLE”.
2 Sardars lookin at an Egyptian mummy.
Sardar1:Look so many bandages,
pakka truck accident case hai.
Sardar2: Aaho,
truck number bhi likha hay, BC-1760
Sardar’s Leave application
Dear Sir,
My wife is ill.
As there is no other Husband
in the family to look after her,
Kindly grant me leave for one day.
Interviewer asked sardarji:
Which are the 2 latest versions of java?
Sardarji: Marjava & Mitjava
A sardarji went to a
STD/ISD/PCO SHOP and
slapped the operator twice.
 Guess why ?
bcoz there it was written
“Number dial karnay se pehley do lagain”
Teacher : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing,
one is green and one is blue with red spots!
Sardar ji: Yes it’s really strange.
I’ve got another pair of the same at home.
Sardarji is not sleeping with his wife! these days
Guess why?
because somebody had told him that
it is wrong to sleep with married women.
Sardar: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun
to muje sirf awaaz sunaideti hai, aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt.
Sardarji opens his lunch box
in the middle of the road….why ?
Just to confirm whether he is going
to or coming back from the office
Sardar : Sitting on The Top of the Mountain and Studying….
When a person asked what he was doing….
He replied… Oye!! Higher Studies Yaar…!!!
A Teacher lecturing on population -
In India after Every 10 sec a
woman gives birth to a kid.
A Sardar stands up-
we must find & stop her!.
Sardar-
why r all these people running?
Man- This is a race, the winner will get the cup.
Sardar-If only the winner will get the cup,
why r others running?
How can a Sardar Kill a Lion ?
Sardarji thinks N thinks hard
&
comes to a conclusion:
I’ll drink poison n let lion eat me.
How do you recognize a Sardar in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from
the book when the teacher erases the board.
Sardar at an Art Gallery:
I suppose this horrible looking thing is
what you call modern art ?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon sir, thats a mirror!
Sardar’s wish : when i die,
I wanna die like my grandpa
who died peacefully in his sleep
not screaming
like all the passengers in the
car he was driving..
Sardar wins 20 cr from Rs. 20 lottery ticket.
Dealer gave 11cr after deducting tax.
Angry Sardar:
“Give me 20 cr or else return my 20 Rs back.”
Sardar told his servant:
Go and water the plants. Servant
it’s already raining. Sardar: So what?
Take an umbrella and go.
Teacher: “I killed a person”
convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is “u will go to jail”.
Sardar got into a bus on 1st April
when conductor asked for ticket.
He gave Rs.10/-
and took the ticket and said april fool.
I have pass.
Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife.
Two seconds later a report came
to his phone and he started dancing.
The report said, “DELIVERED”.
Sardar proposed a girl……
Girl said am 1 yr elder to u…….
Sardar said Oye no problem
soniye I’ll marry u next year.
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Don’t worry, I have a one more.
On a romantic day sardar’s girlfriend asks him,
“Darling on our engagement day will you give me a ring?”
Sardar : “Ya sure, from landline or mobile”.
Doctor to sardar : You will die within 2 hours.
Do you want to see any one before you die?
Sardar : Yes. A good doctor.
Sardar was busy removing
a wheel from his auto.
A man asks sardar why are
you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board.
Parking is only for 2 wheeler
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer.
Boss was happy and asked “what you did till evening?”
Sardar :”Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright”
Interviewee;What is your date of birth?
Sardar;nov 28.
Interviewer;which year?
Sardar;abey ullu everyyear.
A sardarji photographer is focusing
a dead body’s face in a funeral function,
suddenly all dead persons relatives beat him.
why? He said “SMILE PLEASE”
What ur name means......... check it out !!
Instructions : What you do is find out what each letter of your name means.
Then connect all the meanings and it describes YOU. (Its TRUE) & (Is'nt it GREAT !!)
If you have double or triple letters, just count the meaning once.
For Example : ANIL
A=You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.
N=You like to work, but you always want a break.
I=You are always smiling and making others smile.
L=Love is something you deeply believe in.
*A* = You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.
*B *= You are always cautious when it comes to meeting newpeople.
*C *= You definitely have a partier side in you, don't be shy to show it.
*D *= You have trouble trusting people.
*E* =You are a very exciting person.
*F *= Everyone loves you.
*G *= You have excellent ways of viewing people.
*H *=You are not judgmental.
*I *=You are always smiling and making others smile.
*J *=Jealously
*K* =You like to try new things.
*L *= Love is something you deeply believe in.
*M *= Success comes easily to you.
*N *= You like to work, but you always want a break.
*O *= You are very open-minded.
*P* =You are very friendly and understanding.
*Q* = You are a hypocrite.
*R *=You are a social butterfly.
*S *= You are very broad-minded.
*T *= You have an attitude, a big one.
*U *= You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.
*V *= You have a very good physique and looks.
*W *= You like your privacy.
*X *= You never let people tell you what to do.
*Y *= You cause a lot of trouble.
*Z *= You're always fighting with someone.
CHECK YOUR NAME MEANING AND YOU WILL FIND THAT THIS IS
TRUE.........
go to top
hPage.com websites: Easy Money | Websites 4 Sale & Hosting Services |
